“Hey, my dudes, I did it, I’m here! Where’s the gifting suite? Where’s the VIP seats and the misters and the Reformation boutique and can you drive me backstage when Lana del Rey goes on, because the dust is…”
“Wait, what? We’re NOT at Coachella? Then WTF am I doing dressing for the worst possible tan lines? I can’t believe I blew all my ribbons and mesh two weeks early. My assistant is so fired.”