Jennifer Lopez — still, by the way, playing out the string of movies Ben Affleck co-produced during their marriage — is starring in a new rendition of Kiss of the Spider Woman by Chicago’s Bill Condon. And I realize the titular woman in that movie is not Spider Woman in the comic book sense; nonetheless I look at this and remember Zendaya wearing webs to the premiere of Spider Man: The Middle One I Think, and then Dakota Johnson going with a full sheer blingy version for Madame Web, and then turn back to J.Lo here and can only sigh, “Spider webs for a spider movie? Groundbreaking.”

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I also think J.Lo’s Valdrin Sahiti might be the least effective. It looks like she got tangled up in a hammock while waiting for lover in a lace nightie. Also, this is just the Sundance premiere. What’s left for when it actually hits theaters? Will she have an ACTUAL live tarantula spinning a web around her in real time? I hope the world still exists by then; that’ll be thrilling.

[Photo: Neilson Barnard/Getty Images]